Big mouth strikes again

Like many people, I’ve got anxiety, especially in situations of public speaking. Yesterday, in a class I’ve been taking, I was asked to share with the group. I started out one direction and ended up going ‘off script’ and sharing a little more than I was comfortable with. My brain was totally aware that I was going in the wrong direction, but inexplicably couldn’t stop my mouth from talking. 

Of course I felt 100% stupid and exposed in front of my class. What makes it worse is again, my anxiety, won’t let me let it go. I’ve spent the better part of 24 hours stewing about what I overshared. 

The worst part is that I have 4 more weeks with these people and I feel terrible. I went so far to email the instructor and tell her I was sorry for my actions and that I hope the class can move past it as well. The part that’s even worse than that, is this isn’t the first time something like this has happened. I think it might be a condition I’m suffering from. 

Is there such a thing? Facing my class this week isn’t going to be easy. I’m hoping for the best. This group is generally pretty open minded and kind. I just feel colossally stupid. 

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~ by wendemachete on October 3, 2016.

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